We know our baby isn’t actually a dress-up dolly, but we just can’t help it… sure, we were grateful for all the presents and hand me downs that came our way when they were born, but now we’ve worked out what we actually like putting them in, and we wouldn’t want to compromise their aesthetic. So, which winning look does your little one rock day to day?
Organic Oliver and Olivia
Never knowingly high street, Oliver and Olivia are an explosion of colour and soft, organic fabrics, either ordered from cool Scandi sites or lovingly stitched by jolly work-at-home-mums by the seaside because god forbid anyone has the same clothes as them. Also likely to be brightly cloth-bummed, but it’s defo for the eco credentials and not because the patterns are just so cute. Well, mostly.
Slogan Sylvie and Sam
DADDY’S LITTLE HERO. I WANT TO BE A UNICORN. BEST BROTHER EVER. Yep, Sylvie and Sam quite literally make a statement with their many varied slogan t-shirts and onesies. And long may it continue, because there’s nothing funnier than seeing a tantrumming toddler rolling on the floor with HAPPY printed across their chest in giant rainbow glitter letters.
Hand-me-down Harry and Harriet
You can’t actually tell Harry from Harriet since their wardrobes are a mish-mash of cousin Clara’s old flowery leggings and brother Byron’s tractor vests. There’s a rumour going round baby group that those greying tights have been worn by three generations… waste not want not. And funnily enough, this lot seem to be able to afford an awful lot of nice holidays, they just look a bit weird wearing a faded Christmas jumper by the pool.
Designer Delilah and Dexter
When your lifestyle is no longer suited to Louboutins and Mulberries, you’ve got to get your kicks somehow, so dressing your darling in head to toe designer garms (even if they are from TK Maxx) will have to do. But you know you’ve gone too far when you organise a social media appeal for a lost Gucci dummy.
Edgy Ezra and Ella
“Ooh, that’s… different!” says Granny when she sees Ezra or Ella wearing distressed grey jeggings and a holey black jumper. Usually found in trendy urban areas, this strain of baby is too cool for colour, too cool for gender and certainly too cool for rainbows and unicorns.
Athleisure Alfie and Amelia
Boasting a more impressive trainer collection than Kanye West despite walking being many, many months away, these guys can be found being rocked in their prams in the cluttered aisles of Sports Direct. And yes, you can get baseball caps for newborns.
Traditional Tilly and Tarquin
Bloomers! Booties! Bonnets! Oh yes, these two are covered in items of baby attire that are entirely unnecessary in the 21st century, in the hope that they might get mistaken for a distant royal, or at least someone who knows Liz Hurley. After all, why would you put your precious poppet in stretchy, machine washable fabrics when there’s dry clean only velvet and lace to be had?
Stereotyped Stanley and Sienna
In a bid to ensure that nobody ever stumbles over their gender, Stanley is dressed like an off-duty estate agent – think jeans, waistcoats, tiny checked shirts, possibly items that actually say “little man” on them, while Sienna has a MASSIVE pink bow on her bald head, because all hell would break loose if anyone said anything awkward in the supermarket about her being a lovely little boy. Strong candidates for a toddler/teenager rebellion involving tutus and shaved heads respectively.
Loungewear Lily and Logan
Also known as Give-a-shit George and Georgia. It’s supermarket sleepsuits for the entire first year for this lot. Comfy, cute and functional, their mum thinks anything else is a waste of time and money. Sure, but it’s so much fun too…