From the second they emerge into the world, children have a real knack of taking up all of our waking hours, and plenty of our sleeping ones too. There’s no avoiding the fact that this kinda puts the kibosh on pre-baby indulgences like showering unobserved, hoovering before the mother-in-law comes over and recreational sleeping. But, it turns out, this is fine; having a tiny companion keeping you company during bathroom trips is rather sweet, watching your MIL hoover after you weep hormonally about the state of the carpet is strangely satisfying and it turns out sleep is totally overrated (one of these statements is a lie) (it’s the last one).
Still, something’s got to give when newborn cuddles, adorable new-tooth grins, baby babble, chiselling cereal off the kitchen floor, toddler hilarity and tidying up the same toys over and over again are taking up all our time… here are the things we just don’t have time for right now.
Nothing says ‘I’ve got small kids’ like a cold cuppa. When they’re babies, tea and coffee are always juuuuuust out of reach (or imaginary when you’re trapped under a snoozing baby wishing you had Mr Tickle arms to reach the kettle). When little ones get moving, hot drinks migrate to the highest flat surface in the room and you’ll almost certainly discover a stone-cold, completely forgotten peppermint infusion languishing on a top shelf days after you made it.
Shopping with a baby is possible, although the success of the trip usually depends on whether or not they’re asleep. Even then, trying to clamber in and out of clothes in a cubicle containing a complicated travel system without waking the occupant is a challenge, as is tiptoeing around the supermarket flinching every time the bloody tannoy goes off – bing bong! Hooray for online shopping.
Finishing a conversation
Finishing a what sorry? Oh yes, a conver… Noah, no! We don’t draw on the cat! Sorry, what were you saying? Is that your phone? No, you’re right, it is my doorbell. Another ASOS delivery for my neighbour? Sure, why not… yep, let me sign… actually… got to dash, the baby’s woken up… argh, Noah, don’t put the cat down the toilet!
For those of us who are partial to craft gin and posh tonic at the end of the day, giving up booze for nine months (and the rest) is a bit of a miserable thought. But it soon becomes normal and, once the baby’s arrived and settled into a routine (ie waking up at midnight, 3am and getting up for good at 5am) the idea of nursing a stinking hangover whilst watching Raa Raa the Noisy Lion and changing nappies is just… nope to the power of nope.
Babies laugh (well, gurgle) in the face of to do lists and jobs like gardening, DIY, cooking, cleaning and assembling that flatpack furniture that’s been in the hall since you were eight months pregnant can feel like they’re never going to get done. If you’re all out of time, our friends at Airtasker can help you find and securely pay somebody near you to help out with the tasks that just won’t vacate your to do list, dammit…
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