Other than the fact that they were conceived about nine months previously, anyway…
Aries (21st March – 20th April)
Most likely to: Want ALL the toys. They’re excitable and need lots of stimulation, so your house will be overflowing with brightly coloured flashing tat before their first year is out.
Least likely to: Sit quietly in the buggy while you enjoy a coffee. In fact, they will protest loudly. LET ME OUT!
Taurus (21st April – 21st May)
Most likely to: Carry their comforter wherever they go. Taureans get comfort from nice textures. Make sure you buy back-up!
Least likely to: Stay in their own bed all night. They are big on cuddles, so you might have a co-sleeper on your hands.
Gemini (22nd May – 21st June)
Most likely to: Open ALL the cupboards once they’re mobile. Better get baby-proofing, this inquisitive mind is going to try and defeat you.
Least likely to: Obey your commands. Geminis like making decisions for themselves. Even decisions like “am I going to lose my shit during this nappy change or not?”.
Cancer (22nd June – 23rd July)
Most likely to: Never leave home. Cancerians are very family-focused; basically they just love you so, so much, forever and ever. Which is kind of why you signed up to this parenting thing, right?
Least likely to: Embrace change. So when it comes to weaning, potty training or moving them to their own room (let alone house…), take it very slowly.
Leo (24th July – 23rd August)
Most likely to: Have opinions about their outfits from an early age. Oh yes, this is the kid who wants to wear a tutu and wellies to a doctor’s appointment. Embrace the madness or you’ll never get out of the house.
Least likely to: Share nicely. They take great pride in their own possessions, so it won’t go down well if Isla from Baby Sensory tries to nick their favourite rattly egg.
Virgo (24th August – 23rd September)
Most likely to: Fall into a routine more easily than most. They’re probably reading Gina Ford even if you’re not.
Least likely to: Poo their pants. They’re future neat freaks who hate a dirty nappy and will be potentially easy to potty train at a younger age than their sloppier mates.
Libra (24th September – 23rd October)
Most likely to: Be an early talker. Librans are sociable little things who thrive on company and communicating. So watch your language, as they might well copy…
Least likely to: Sleep through the night. You’ll need to knacker this one out if you want a good night’s sleep, they’re just too easily stimulated.
Scorpio (24th October – 22nd November)
Most likely to: Love being carried in a sling. They love the human touch so babywearing is a great way to keep them close and cosy. “If I can’t have you no one can…” is their mantra, even if at this stage it will sound more like “wah wah ba ba ba ba”.
Least likely to: Be happily left with a babysitter. They need security so can be prone to clinginess… when the time comes to settle them in at childcare, clear your diary, you may be some time.
Sagittarius (23rd November – 21st December)
Most likely to: Walk before their mates. They’re very physical and potentially quite sporty… start saving up for all those gymnastics/football/baby yoga lessons now.
Least likely to: Enjoy a day chilling at home. They love fresh air and company, so getting out and about as much as possible is essential, before you both go stir crazy.
Capricorn (22nd December – 20th January)
Most likely to: look like a tiny little old man. OK OK, so all babies look a little bit like tiny little old men, but your Capricorn cutie has the old soul to back it up.
Least likely to: throw their toys out of the pram. They are born sensible and frown upon such lack of control.
Aquarius (21st January – 19th February)
Most likely to: charm you with their smile. They’ll quickly realise that they get the reaction they want when they flash their gummy grin at you.
Least likely to: Happily sit in front of CBeebies all day. This baby wants colour and culture… take them to an art gallery to keep them stimulated and you sane.
Pisces (20th February – 20th March)
Most likely to: Actually enjoy the craft projects you half-heartedly instigate. Stock up on play doh and crayons, you could have a creative genius on your hands.
Least likely to: Stick out soft play. Loud noise and too many people can all be a bit much for baby Pisces so you might find yourself leaving playgroups and parties early with a wet fish on your hands; they much prefer quiet, quality time with their loved ones (and that’s you).