Let us guess, you used to eat breakfast in the morning, lunchtime in the middle of the day and dinner in the evening, perhaps with a few snacks here and there? How quaint. One of the most annoying things about the early weeks with a baby is the way your meal schedule goes all out of whack. Between sustaining human life, sleeping in any tiny slithers of time you can get your knackered hands on and putting on your best earth mother smile for the succession of visitors wielding biscuits, you’ll find that your normal routine goes out of the window. So, if your partner’s gone back to work and you’ve found yourself alone in charge of a baby and quite frankly bloody starving, we’re here to help. These aren’t so much super foods, as super easy to prepare, super easy to eat for when you’re super-duper knackered foods. Maybe get some vitamins too, yeah?
Anything in a wrap
Got some just about still edible cheese knocking around in the fridge and perhaps some ham if you’re meatily inclined? Shove it in a wrap (keep some in the freezer if consuming baked goods within their best before window has become challenging), squash it in a toastie machine – or just a pan if you’re lacking in the finest 1970s sandwich technology – and ram it into your gob. Faster to eat and easier to hold together than a proper sandwich, plus can be spruced up with a bit of wilting lettuce or tomato if you’re feeling really fancy.
Take one bag of tortilla chips (one of the bigguns obviously, no judgment here) and one bag of grated cheese. Mix them together on a microwaveable plate. Shove in the microwave for a minute or two, until it’s all nice and melty. GO NUTS. Bonus points if you have any salsa or guacamole knocking about… but ketchup will do the trick tbf.
Any old smoothie/milkshake
You haven’t got the time for chopping up fresh fruit obviously – who do we think you are, some kind of wellness guru? – but get yourself a freezer bag of pre-chopped fruit, shove a couple of handfuls of it in a jug, with some milk if you fancy and perhaps some squished banana, and give it a whoosh with a hand blender, or that juicing machine you used religiously for a few days in January three years ago. Voila, a delicious smoothie that actually means you feel vaguely healthy for the first time in weeks. Swig it back and reward your brilliance later with half a packet of Hob Nobs.
Eggs a la you
Last time someone asked how you like your eggs, you ended up pregnant. This is why we’re going to leave the serving suggestions to you, but point out that most egg-based delicacies can be concocted in mere seconds in the microwave, with minimum physical exertion. Gobble up your mounds of yolky goodness with a packet of ready-chopped smoked salmon and imagine you are brunching with your gal pals in a New York bistro, not watching Homes Under The Hammer with a bald expressionless energy-sucker in a dark, cluttered living room.
A massive bar of chocolate
No instructions required.